An e-mail I just received

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JennyB
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An e-mail I just received

Post by JennyB » 14 Oct 2008, 2:03pm

I stupidly got myself into a debate with my friend Brandon (the gay guy who loves Sarah Palin and doesn't understand it when I compare that to if I loved Pat Buchanan). He had sent that picture of the person with their head up their ass and entitled it "Obama Supporters." Scott sent a response that it could easily be Palin supporters, and someone asked what he meant. So I responded with the example of absitnence-only education not working too well in her family...here is what I received from a woman named Nancy Barnes:

From what I've seen of your notes, you don't have a relationship with Jesus, do you? Unless you get right with God, yes, you will go to hell. Also, your smart-mouthed remarks come across as smirking against God. Not a good idea! But, then, you don't believe in that, do you? Evolution is your bag! Sad!!

I can only guess that she saw my e-mail address jkbernstein@sbcglobal.net and assumed I was Jewish? I can't think of any other explanation. It made my day. :mrgreen:
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eumaas
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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by eumaas » 14 Oct 2008, 2:07pm

Send her the song Rock Me Sexy Jesus from Hamlet 2 and tell her your relationship with the J-man is fine as in he's so fine.
I feel that there is a fascistic element, for example, in the Rolling Stones . . .
— Morton Feldman

I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by Dr. Medulla » 14 Oct 2008, 2:10pm

Some Dumb Ass wrote:you don't have a relationship with Jesus, do you?
I'm always intrigued by these kinds of statements. What kind of relationship do Christians have with Jesus? The guy never talks to them, doesn't write, didn't even fucking live at the same time. So what is the relationship? What's my relationship with, I dunno, George Orwell or Bobby Kennedy? Isn't it implied that a relationship requires a least two conscious partners?
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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by Wolter » 14 Oct 2008, 2:11pm

Jen, you have a lot of run-ins with idiots.
”INDER LOCK THE THE KISS THREAD IVE REALISED IM A PRZE IDOOT” - Thomas Jefferson

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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by Flex » 14 Oct 2008, 2:12pm

Wolter wrote:Jen, you have a lot of run-ins with idiots.
St. Louis
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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by Wolter » 14 Oct 2008, 2:13pm

Flex wrote:
Wolter wrote:Jen, you have a lot of run-ins with idiots.
St. Louis

Duly noted.
”INDER LOCK THE THE KISS THREAD IVE REALISED IM A PRZE IDOOT” - Thomas Jefferson

"But the gorilla thinks otherwise!"

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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by JennyB » 14 Oct 2008, 2:19pm

Flex wrote:
Wolter wrote:Jen, you have a lot of run-ins with idiots.
St. Louis
Exactly. Oh, she sent me another e-mail apologizing (I hadn't responded to her, so maybe she thought to kill me with kindness) and said that she didn't realize my race. My race? last time I checked I was as boring lily-white as the rest of them. She also implored me to try Jews for Jesus. This time I responded, "OK, but only if you try Christians for Budda."
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eumaas
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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by eumaas » 14 Oct 2008, 2:20pm

Shit, I don't even have a good relationship with myself, and I spend all my time with me. I even talk to myself sometimes, but it doesn't seem to help. I just don't know what to do with me anymore.
I feel that there is a fascistic element, for example, in the Rolling Stones . . .
— Morton Feldman

I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

JennyB
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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by JennyB » 14 Oct 2008, 2:30pm

eumaas wrote:Shit, I don't even have a good relationship with myself, and I spend all my time with me. I even talk to myself sometimes, but it doesn't seem to help. I just don't know what to do with me anymore.
Masturbate.
Got a Rake? Sure!

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eumaas
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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by eumaas » 14 Oct 2008, 2:31pm

JennyB wrote:
eumaas wrote:Shit, I don't even have a good relationship with myself, and I spend all my time with me. I even talk to myself sometimes, but it doesn't seem to help. I just don't know what to do with me anymore.
Masturbate.
I just can't find the time to be with me like that, and frankly I've been bored by me lately. I haven't tried anything new in a long time, and I just can't convince myself to do anything exotic.
I feel that there is a fascistic element, for example, in the Rolling Stones . . .
— Morton Feldman

I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by Dr. Medulla » 14 Oct 2008, 2:41pm

eumaas wrote:
JennyB wrote:
eumaas wrote:Shit, I don't even have a good relationship with myself, and I spend all my time with me. I even talk to myself sometimes, but it doesn't seem to help. I just don't know what to do with me anymore.
Masturbate.
I just can't find the time to be with me like that, and frankly I've been bored by me lately. I haven't tried anything new in a long time, and I just can't convince myself to do anything exotic.
The Internet has a couple sites, I think, that help you pretend there's someone sort of with you, at least in your mind.
Endut! Hoch Hech!

eumaas
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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by eumaas » 14 Oct 2008, 2:41pm

Dr. Medulla wrote:
eumaas wrote:
JennyB wrote:
eumaas wrote:Shit, I don't even have a good relationship with myself, and I spend all my time with me. I even talk to myself sometimes, but it doesn't seem to help. I just don't know what to do with me anymore.
Masturbate.
I just can't find the time to be with me like that, and frankly I've been bored by me lately. I haven't tried anything new in a long time, and I just can't convince myself to do anything exotic.
The Internet has a couple sites, I think, that help you pretend there's someone sort of with you, at least in your mind.
But I am with me.
I feel that there is a fascistic element, for example, in the Rolling Stones . . .
— Morton Feldman

I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

Dr. Medulla
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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by Dr. Medulla » 14 Oct 2008, 2:48pm

eumaas wrote:
Dr. Medulla wrote:
eumaas wrote:
JennyB wrote:
eumaas wrote:Shit, I don't even have a good relationship with myself, and I spend all my time with me. I even talk to myself sometimes, but it doesn't seem to help. I just don't know what to do with me anymore.
Masturbate.
I just can't find the time to be with me like that, and frankly I've been bored by me lately. I haven't tried anything new in a long time, and I just can't convince myself to do anything exotic.
The Internet has a couple sites, I think, that help you pretend there's someone sort of with you, at least in your mind.
But I am with me.
Allowing you to be the most selfish lover you've ever had.
Endut! Hoch Hech!

eumaas
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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by eumaas » 14 Oct 2008, 2:49pm

Dr. Medulla wrote:
eumaas wrote:
Dr. Medulla wrote:
eumaas wrote:
JennyB wrote: Masturbate.
I just can't find the time to be with me like that, and frankly I've been bored by me lately. I haven't tried anything new in a long time, and I just can't convince myself to do anything exotic.
The Internet has a couple sites, I think, that help you pretend there's someone sort of with you, at least in your mind.
But I am with me.
Allowing you to be the most selfish lover you've ever had.
I'm totally unsatisfied with me. I don't meet my needs anymore--I can barely feed me!
I feel that there is a fascistic element, for example, in the Rolling Stones . . .
— Morton Feldman

I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

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Re: An e-mail I just received

Post by BostonBeaneater » 14 Oct 2008, 2:51pm

Autofellatio!
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