The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Politics and other such topical creams.

Which do you prefer?

House of Habsburg
5
63%
House of Hohenzollern
3
38%
 
Total votes: 8

eumaas
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The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by eumaas » 31 Jan 2018, 5:47pm

:?:
I feel that there is a fascistic element, for example, in the Rolling Stones . . .
— Morton Feldman

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Dr. Medulla
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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by Dr. Medulla » 31 Jan 2018, 5:54pm

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Endut! Hoch Hech!

Heston
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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by Heston » 31 Jan 2018, 5:56pm

The House of Black Diamond.
I just polished off some Low Country shrimp & grits and a mess of collards. That's a hell of a strain on the arm.

matedog
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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by matedog » 31 Jan 2018, 6:00pm

It feels good to be vindicated after all these years re:fire crotches. :cool:
Look, you have to establish context for these things. And I maintain that unless you appreciate the Fall of Constantinople, the Great Fire of London, and Mickey Mantle's fatalist alcoholism, live Freddy makes no sense. If you want to half-ass it, fine, go call Simon Schama to do the appendix.

eumaas
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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by eumaas » 31 Jan 2018, 6:01pm

okay, who's the prussian?
I feel that there is a fascistic element, for example, in the Rolling Stones . . .
— Morton Feldman

I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

Dr. Medulla
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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by Dr. Medulla » 31 Jan 2018, 6:11pm

matedog wrote:
31 Jan 2018, 6:00pm
It feels good to be vindicated after all these years re:fire crotches. :cool:
No one has ever advocated for male gingers. Ladies, it's always been about ladies.
Endut! Hoch Hech!

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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by Silent Majority » 31 Jan 2018, 6:22pm

What's the Kennedy curse going to do to this one?
Ain't no man in this land
Who gets up and works for fifty grand


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Rat Patrol
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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by Rat Patrol » 31 Jan 2018, 6:28pm

Silent Majority wrote:
31 Jan 2018, 6:22pm
What's the Kennedy curse going to do to this one?
The hair and teeth genes will swap chromosomes when he turns 45 because of a paternal grandparent -traced mutation from Bobby and Ethel Catholic-breeding themselves a 7th kid too many...and then he'll quickly morph into a narwhal who vomits bright-red weave.
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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by Silent Majority » 31 Jan 2018, 6:29pm

Rat Patrol wrote:
31 Jan 2018, 6:28pm
Silent Majority wrote:
31 Jan 2018, 6:22pm
What's the Kennedy curse going to do to this one?
The hair and teeth genes will swap chromosomes when he turns 45 because of a mutation traced to Bobby and Ethel Catholic-breeding themselves a 7th kid too many...and then he'll quickly morph into a narwhal who vomits bright-red weave.
Ah. You took the words right out of my mouth.
Ain't no man in this land
Who gets up and works for fifty grand


www.pexlives.libsyn.com/

eumaas
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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by eumaas » 31 Jan 2018, 6:43pm

Good to see the noble Habsburgs doing so well.
I feel that there is a fascistic element, for example, in the Rolling Stones . . .
— Morton Feldman

I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

Rat Patrol
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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by Rat Patrol » 31 Jan 2018, 8:12pm

This is Joseph P. Sr...the Nazi-sympathizing booze-runner patriarch:
Image

This is Joe P., Jr...most-favored son who got all blowed up over the North Sea before he had a chance to get all blowed up as Preznit, forcing his pill-popper younger brother who couldn't keep his dick in his pants to have to step in as the Plan B'est of Plan B's.
Image

Giuseppe Sr.'s disappointment in his 'lesser' sons knew no bounds, as they could never possibly measure up to 2's natural charisma...or penchant for taking a body count of his own as his bloodied buckshot carcass hit the ground. So it was only a matter of time before a new scion was commissioned to carry the standard-bearer's name anew.

...but wait!!!...hold that third Roman numeral! What's this???

Here is JoJo P. II, "The Fro".
Image

OMIGOD IT'S HYANNIS CLONE WARS!!!66!!!! :whoa:

Born 8 whole years after JJ Jr. forgot the correct firing sequence for dropping a bomb on a U-boat...ostensibly to Bobby while he kept re-loading the Ethel dispenser to shoot Irish-Brahmin tadpoles all over the room like the joyless Catholic quiverfulls they were. But we know the deep dark truth. On orders from the family they scraped samples of JoeJoe2unior's brainmatter and jizz off the rocks of Suffolk when that plane crashed, smuggled it back into the country in a vial stashed in Rose's favorite pack of Marlboros, and quickly assembled a team of Harvard's most dashing young phrenologists to commence "Operation Camelbot." Ethel, granted clemency by the Pope to take a 5-minute break between pregnancies, was designated as carrier host. Bobby was handed a sock and instructed to pass the time falsely outing Communists in the Bureau of Labor Statistics until Ethel was again serviceable for Churchly fishspawning.

They didn't count on the sample of JJr.'s jizz being contaminated with genetic material from invasive North Sea algal blooms, however, as cloning methods inside Ivy League secret drinking societies were somewhat primitive back in those days. The mutation attached itself to Chromosome 47 (all Kennedys have 2.6 extra ones), and a mighty Jewfro sprouted atop II along with incisors that kept growing constantly throughout life unless filed down by gnawing on the tree bark of a particularly rare species of native Nantucket floræ.


Tragically, however, those iconic family games of touch football on the ski slopes with cousins bashing their brains dead into trees uncontrolled at 50 MPH used balls coated in radium for maximum nighttime visibility, as was custom from their ancestors on the old planet. So the DNA mutations kept evolving apace. Until...during that heady Fall of 1980 when Uncle Ted was the very sorest of losers, JoeyJoJoJu³ was born.

Image

EWWWWWWW!!!! :yuck:


The Fro was devastated. But he ultimately learned to love his aberrational loinproduct as one of his own...just like the second head he was sprouting out of a mass of keratin and tooth enamel that had developed sentience under his left earlobe. So much that he blackmailed Barney Frank into retiring with a trumped-up Internet porn sting to give his son the only gift a loving father could: a lifetime seat in Congress bankrolled by the parasitic insurance lobby.

Image
Image

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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by Dr. Medulla » 31 Jan 2018, 8:18pm

Yeah, but Camelot.
Endut! Hoch Hech!

Inder
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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by Inder » 31 Jan 2018, 8:32pm

If you scroll down quickly, the gentleman on the left in Ratty's last photo looks like he has a rat tail.

eumaas
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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by eumaas » 31 Jan 2018, 9:48pm

I think that is my favorite Rattie post ever.
I feel that there is a fascistic element, for example, in the Rolling Stones . . .
— Morton Feldman

I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

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Re: The Joseph Kennedy III Thread

Post by JennyB » 01 Feb 2018, 10:48am

Dr. Medulla wrote:
31 Jan 2018, 6:11pm
matedog wrote:
31 Jan 2018, 6:00pm
It feels good to be vindicated after all these years re:fire crotches. :cool:
No one has ever advocated for male gingers. Ladies, it's always been about ladies.
A truer statement has never been uttered.
Got a Rake? Sure!

IMCT: Inane Middle-Class Twats - Dr. M

Don't talk shop.

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