If Music Could Talk

Rat Patrol wrote: ↑

15 Mar 2017, 2:14pm

The Masshole in Winter, Pt. II:

What's worse this guy or the one with snow on the roof of his car ready to fly off in one big sheet or slide down the frontt of his windshield?

revbob wrote: ↑

16 Mar 2017, 1:00am

What's worse this guy or the one with snow on the roof of his car ready to fly off in one big sheet or slide down the frontt of his windshield?

The correct answer is: Tractor-trailers who don't clear the snow off their roofs, then let the underside of a low-hanging bridge act as an ice-scraper sending a 300 sq. ft. sheet of rock-hard icepack breaking up midair into giant boulders spreading across all 3 lanes of traffic. Difficulty: none of them obey the "big rigs prohibited in left lane" law so you can't hope to avoid by passing to the left.




See...few SUV terrorists of the expressways up here ever clear their roofs or windows adequately enough. But unlike dumbass in that last pic, most of them obey the same "85th Percentile Mob Rule**" as other Masshole drivers. That is, so long as you flagrantly violate the law (speed, not use turn signal, drive in the right and/or left shoulders, cross multiple lanes at once) comfortably within the bounds of 85% of all other offensive-driver road ragers with Mass plates, the masses outnumber state troopers by such orders of magnitude that they won't ever issue a ticket. And thus, impolite society self-regulates and just darn works, goddamnit.

You can gamble on the 90th percentile if you have a keen eye for unmarked cruisers and/or spent good money on the latest illegal radar detector at the auto show at Bayside Expo Center. Indeed, this will make you a role model to the 85th-and-under. But push the envelope to the 95th percentile and you either need getaway driver skillz to evade detection or risk becoming That Idiot with the windshield in the photo (seriously, a fuckin' Geo in 2017???) to be mocked and torn down on Twitter.


**Offer null and void with New Hampshire, New York, or New Jersey plates as by virtue of simply crossing the Mass state line you have announced yourself as a moving target to be ticketed for anything/everything at-will. Red stater plates ordered to pull over at nearest state-line rest plaza or offramp Dunkies and cry in despair at a motoring world they cannot hope to comprehend.

http://www.cnn.com/2017/03/28/us/storm- ... index.html

By this metric, there were 3000 people killed by tornadoes on I-95 last year.

Yesterday was Halter Top Day, y'alls!

Rat Patrol wrote: ↑

12 Apr 2017, 4:50pm

Yesterday was Halter Top Day, y'alls!

Bill Simmons is a thief. It's Sundress Day and we've been calling it that since as long as I can remember.

BostonBeaneater wrote: ↑

12 Apr 2017, 5:34pm

Rat Patrol wrote: ↑

12 Apr 2017, 4:50pm

Yesterday was Halter Top Day, y'alls!

Bill Simmons is a thief. It's Sundress Day and we've been calling it that since as long as I can remember.

Hack. Bill Simmons is a hack. Stupidly wealthy, but someone coasting extremely well on an innovative schtick a good decade-plus in the past.

Dr. Medulla wrote: ↑

12 Apr 2017, 5:59pm

BostonBeaneater wrote: ↑

12 Apr 2017, 5:34pm

Rat Patrol wrote: ↑

12 Apr 2017, 4:50pm

Yesterday was Halter Top Day, y'alls!

Bill Simmons is a thief. It's Sundress Day and we've been calling it that since as long as I can remember.

Hack. Bill Simmons is a hack. Stupidly wealthy, but someone coasting extremely well on an innovative schtick a good decade-plus in the past.

My friend calls him Shawshank Simmons.

BostonBeaneater wrote: ↑

12 Apr 2017, 7:47pm

Dr. Medulla wrote: ↑

12 Apr 2017, 5:59pm

BostonBeaneater wrote: ↑

12 Apr 2017, 5:34pm

Rat Patrol wrote: ↑

12 Apr 2017, 4:50pm

Yesterday was Halter Top Day, y'alls!

Bill Simmons is a thief. It's Sundress Day and we've been calling it that since as long as I can remember.

Hack. Bill Simmons is a hack. Stupidly wealthy, but someone coasting extremely well on an innovative schtick a good decade-plus in the past.

My friend calls him Shawshank Simmons.

Bill will also answer to Teen Wolf. (That said, I enjoyed his book about the Red Sox and the 2004 season. He had a perfect description of smarty pants La Russa watching his team fuck up as being like a guy in a restaurant looking out the window and seeing his car get towed.)

Oh, sportsball nerds...so dogged in pursuit of holding their scribes' feet to the fire that they can't even acknowledge life's little victories like CLEAVAGE HAS BEEN FREED ACROSS THIS GREAT LAND FROM WINTER'S CRUEL SHACKLES.

It's Sunday...gotta cut the fuckin' grass.

I'd never thought about all the sand that would be left behind from a hurricane and the surges.

Sand is nothing compared to the nightmare fuel a storm surge dredges up:

https://www.forbes.com/sites/grrlscient ... ae7c623ffe