Drummer joke

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Wolter
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Re: Drummer joke

Post by Wolter »

Dr. Medulla wrote:From Amy Rigby's song "Gonna Give the Drummer Some": What's the difference between a drummer and a US savings bond? The bond will eventually mature and make money.
I've actually been telling that joke as a general musician.
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muppet hi fi
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Re: Drummer joke

Post by muppet hi fi »

I missed this thread!

A drummer decides he wants to take up a new instrument, so he goes to the music store and looks around a while. Eventually he walks up to the counter and says to the shop owner "I say. I was thinking of taking up a new musical instrument".
The shop owner says "Wonderful, what were you interested in ?"

The drummer says "Well, I thought I might have a look at the accordian on the floor there, and maybe the sax hanging on the wall behind you".

Shop guy says: "You must be a drummer, yeah?"

Drummer: "Why yes. Yes I am. And how did you know?"

Shop dude: "Because the radiator is bolted to the floor and the fire extinguisher isn't for sale". (there's actually a third item but I can't remember what it is).
Strong shoes is what we got and when they're hot they're hot!
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Re: Drummer joke

Post by muppet hi fi »

How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?






Four. One to change the light bulb and three to sit around and say "I can do that, maaaan. Faster".
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Re: Drummer joke

Post by muppet hi fi »

How can you tell when a banjo is in tune?



It hits B flat when you throw it in the dumpster. (I think that's how that one goes)
Strong shoes is what we got and when they're hot they're hot!
- Marky Dread and his fabulous Screaming Blue Messiahs

muppet hi fi
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Re: Drummer joke

Post by muppet hi fi »

What do you call a tuba player with a business card?


An optimist.
Strong shoes is what we got and when they're hot they're hot!
- Marky Dread and his fabulous Screaming Blue Messiahs

muppet hi fi
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Re: Drummer joke

Post by muppet hi fi »

OK here's a great one.

Dude goes to Africa on safari. When he gets off the boat he notices loud drumming in the distance. He asks the tour guide "So what's with the drumming?"

Tour guide says "Oh, when drums stop...very very bad".

This goes on a while, in fact for several days. And every time the guy asks the tour guide what's up with the drumming, he gets the same very grave reply: "When drums stop - is very, very bad!"

This goes on for a few more days and finally the dude can't take it anymore and demands of the the tour guide an explanation of the incessant drumming and what is so horrible when it stops. Tour guide says two words:

"Bass solo".
Strong shoes is what we got and when they're hot they're hot!
- Marky Dread and his fabulous Screaming Blue Messiahs

biopunk
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Re: Drummer joke

Post by biopunk »

muppet hi fi wrote:OK here's a great one.

Dude goes to Africa on safari. When he gets off the boat he notices loud drumming in the distance. He asks the tour guide "So what's with the drumming?"

Tour guide says "Oh, when drums stop...very very bad".

This goes on a while, in fact for several days. And every time the guy asks the tour guide what's up with the drumming, he gets the same very grave reply: "When drums stop - is very, very bad!"

This goes on for a few more days and finally the dude can't take it anymore and demands of the the tour guide an explanation of the incessant drumming and what is so horrible when it stops. Tour guide says two words:

"Bass solo".
As someone who played bass, I laughed.
Chewing oot a rhythm on my bubblegum

muppet hi fi
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Re: Drummer joke

Post by muppet hi fi »

biopunk wrote:
muppet hi fi wrote:OK here's a great one.

Dude goes to Africa on safari. When he gets off the boat he notices loud drumming in the distance. He asks the tour guide "So what's with the drumming?"

Tour guide says "Oh, when drums stop...very very bad".

This goes on a while, in fact for several days. And every time the guy asks the tour guide what's up with the drumming, he gets the same very grave reply: "When drums stop - is very, very bad!"

This goes on for a few more days and finally the dude can't take it anymore and demands of the the tour guide an explanation of the incessant drumming and what is so horrible when it stops. Tour guide says two words:

"Bass solo".
As someone who played bass, I laughed.
As someone who plays drums (and couldn't play a solo beyond 16 measures to save my life and the lives of my band mates), I sighed heavily, had a drink with the bass player, and laughed.
Strong shoes is what we got and when they're hot they're hot!
- Marky Dread and his fabulous Screaming Blue Messiahs

Wolter
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Re: Drummer joke

Post by Wolter »

Ok, in the interest of fairness:

How do you get two guitarists to play in unison?






Shoot one.
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Re: Drummer joke

Post by muppet hi fi »

OK keep 'em coming folks! I'm finally getting some insight into my entire adult life and the lives of most of my closest friends :mrgreen:
Strong shoes is what we got and when they're hot they're hot!
- Marky Dread and his fabulous Screaming Blue Messiahs

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Re: Drummer joke

Post by Heston »

What did the drummer call his twins?

Anna one, Anna two.
There's a tiny, tiny hopeful part of me that says you guys are running a Kaufmanesque long con on the board

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Re: Drummer joke

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matedog
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Re: Drummer joke

Post by matedog »

Heston wrote:
23 Aug 2018, 6:19am
What did the drummer call his twins?

Anna one, Anna two.
BTW, I laughed at this and told the wife (who chuckled politely).
Look, you have to establish context for these things. And I maintain that unless you appreciate the Fall of Constantinople, the Great Fire of London, and Mickey Mantle's fatalist alcoholism, live Freddy makes no sense. If you want to half-ass it, fine, go call Simon Schama to do the appendix.

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Re: Drummer joke

Post by matedog »

"By the time my drummer wandered off to start a solo project or drink himself to death — or both, I don’t know — there was already a new one en route. " Alright, I laughed.
Look, you have to establish context for these things. And I maintain that unless you appreciate the Fall of Constantinople, the Great Fire of London, and Mickey Mantle's fatalist alcoholism, live Freddy makes no sense. If you want to half-ass it, fine, go call Simon Schama to do the appendix.

Kory
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Re: Drummer joke

Post by Kory »

matedog wrote:
02 Oct 2018, 4:34pm
"By the time my drummer wandered off to start a solo project or drink himself to death — or both, I don’t know — there was already a new one en route. " Alright, I laughed.
That article lead me to this one, which I found quite funny (FAO Flex, I think): https://thehardtimes.net/music/skinhead ... -not-good/
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