Cute, if you're a dog lover

Sweet action for kids 'n' cretins. Marjoram and capers.
Post Reply
Mimi
User avatar
Goddess of the Underworld
Posts: 8819
Joined: 15 Jun 2008, 2:36pm
Location: Down in the pit

Cute, if you're a dog lover

Post by Mimi »

How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?

1. Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?

2. Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.

3. Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!

4. Rottweiler: Make me.

5. Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.

6. Lab: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!

7. German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.

8. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.?

9. Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb!

10. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark. All too true!

11. Chihuahua : Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Or 'We don't need no stinking light bulb.'

12. Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?

13. Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...

14. Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

How many cats does it take to change a light bulb?

Cats do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So, the real question is:
'How long will it be before I can expect some light, some dinner, and a massage?'


ALL OF WHICH PROVES, ONCE AGAIN, THAT WHILE DOGS HAVE MASTERS, CATS HAVE STAFF!

Wolter
User avatar
Half Foghorn Leghorn, Half Albert Brooks
Posts: 55432
Joined: 15 Jun 2008, 7:59pm
Location: ¡HOLIDAY RO-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-OAD!

Re: Cute, if you're a dog lover

Post by Wolter »

The Spark does not approve of the Chihuahua entry.
”INDER LOCK THE THE KISS THREAD IVE REALISED IM A PRZE IDOOT” - Thomas Jefferson

"But the gorilla thinks otherwise!"

JennyB
User avatar
Mossad Van Driver
Posts: 22316
Joined: 16 Jun 2008, 1:13pm
Location: Moranjortsville

Re: Cute, if you're a dog lover

Post by JennyB »

<--------- This guy's a mutt, so he's trying to figure out where he belongs. Sort of like a Goth teenager.
Got a Rake? Sure!

IMCT: Inane Middle-Class Twats - Dr. M

" *sigh* it's right when they throw the penis pump out the window." -Hoy

threecoffins
User avatar
Sasquatch Determinator
Posts: 1734
Joined: 18 Jun 2008, 10:33am
Location: Toronto

Re: Cute, if you're a dog lover

Post by threecoffins »

JennyB wrote:<--------- This guy's a mutt, so he's trying to figure out where he belongs. Sort of like a Goth teenager.
Well he's got one up on the Goth kids, what with those unsettlingly glowing eyes.

JennyB
User avatar
Mossad Van Driver
Posts: 22316
Joined: 16 Jun 2008, 1:13pm
Location: Moranjortsville

Re: Cute, if you're a dog lover

Post by JennyB »

threecoffins wrote:
JennyB wrote:<--------- This guy's a mutt, so he's trying to figure out where he belongs. Sort of like a Goth teenager.
Well he's got one up on the Goth kids, what with those unsettlingly glowing eyes.
All the better to zombify you with!
Got a Rake? Sure!

IMCT: Inane Middle-Class Twats - Dr. M

" *sigh* it's right when they throw the penis pump out the window." -Hoy

Dr. Medulla
User avatar
Atheistic Epileptic
Posts: 116680
Joined: 15 Jun 2008, 2:00pm
Location: Straight Banana, Idaho

Re: Cute, if you're a dog lover

Post by Dr. Medulla »

Samoyed: I love you love you love you love you, but I really have no clue how to do anything.
"I used to bullseye womp rats in my T-16 back in Whittier, they're not much bigger than two meters.'" - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft

Post Reply