Does Nick Markakis really exist?

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ChicoHarris
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Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by ChicoHarris »

In Sports Illustrated this week, four professional athletes are asked who the rock band Wilco is and all four claimed to not know.
One, Baltimore Orioles right-fielder Nick Markakis, also said the food that turns his stomach is salad and that his favorite summer drink is Coors Light.
If the boy would try beer instead, his team wouldn't be 19 games behind the first-place 26-time World Champion New York Yankees.

In that same issue, there is a page-and-a-half photograph of Blue Jays pitcher Roy Halladay and a lot of ya-ya-dee-dee-dah about what a bad ass he is and how his presence on their roster would improve other teams.
Last night in Toronto, Hideki Matsui and his first-place New York Yankee teammates spanked that Halladay butt into the Loser Column.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/05/sport ... ref=sports

eumaas
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by eumaas »

I like to party with my boots.
I feel that there is a fascistic element, for example, in the Rolling Stones . . .
— Morton Feldman

I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

Dr. Medulla
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by Dr. Medulla »

ChicoHarris wrote:In that same issue, there is a page-and-a-half photograph of Blue Jays pitcher Roy Halladay and a lot of ya-ya-dee-dee-dah about what a bad ass he is and how his presence on their roster would improve other teams.
Last night in Toronto, Hideki Matsui and his first-place New York Yankee teammates spanked that Halladay butt into the Loser Column.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/05/sport ... ref=sports
Two things: there is a baseball thread—200+ pages and growing—so you don't need to start new baseball threads every time, and are you suggesting that Roy Halladay isn't a bad ass who wouldn't improve other teams? Really? He's not perfect, but he's one of the three best pitchers in baseball (I'd say Lincecum is the only one better).
"I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung." - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft

modskin
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by modskin »

Better question..

Does Chico Harris really exist?
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Heston
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by Heston »

Who's Nick Markakis? Is he the president of Madagascar or something?
There's a tiny, tiny hopeful part of me that says you guys are running a Kaufmanesque long con on the board

Mimi
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by Mimi »

Dr. Medulla wrote:
ChicoHarris wrote:In that same issue, there is a page-and-a-half photograph of Blue Jays pitcher Roy Halladay and a lot of ya-ya-dee-dee-dah about what a bad ass he is and how his presence on their roster would improve other teams.
Last night in Toronto, Hideki Matsui and his first-place New York Yankee teammates spanked that Halladay butt into the Loser Column.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/05/sport ... ref=sports
Two things: there is a baseball thread—200+ pages and growing—so you don't need to start new baseball threads every time, and are you suggesting that Roy Halladay isn't a bad ass who wouldn't improve other teams? Really? He's not perfect, but he's one of the three best pitchers in baseball (I'd say Lincecum is the only one better).

Yeah, Halladay is almost as badass as Andrew Eugene Pettitte. :shifty:

Halladay is awesome actually and I hate him for that.

Nick Markakis does exist, I'm pretty sure of it. I saw him bat once or twice.

Dr. Medulla
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by Dr. Medulla »

Heston wrote:Who's Nick Markakis? Is he the president of Madagascar or something?
Plays right field for the Baltimore Orioles. Very good player for a very shitty team.
"I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung." - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft

Mimi
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by Mimi »

Heston wrote:Who's Nick Markakis? Is he the president of Madagascar or something?
You'll know soon enough. He'll be colonizing England any minute now.

Heston
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by Heston »

Dr. Medulla wrote:
Heston wrote:Who's Nick Markakis? Is he the president of Madagascar or something?
Plays right field for the Baltimore Orioles. Very good player for a very shitty team.
I understood three words of your first sentence.
There's a tiny, tiny hopeful part of me that says you guys are running a Kaufmanesque long con on the board

eumaas
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by eumaas »

Mimi wrote:
Heston wrote:Who's Nick Markakis? Is he the president of Madagascar or something?
You'll know soon enough. He'll be colonizing England any minute now.
All hail Generalissimo Markakis!
I feel that there is a fascistic element, for example, in the Rolling Stones . . .
— Morton Feldman

I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

Mimi
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by Mimi »

modskin wrote:Better question..

Does Chico Harris really exist?
Who is Chico Harris? The burning question on everyone's mind. Ok, maybe not everyone's but, you know...

eumaas
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by eumaas »

Mimi wrote:Who is Chico Harris? The burning cross on everyone's yard.
Asked and answered.
I feel that there is a fascistic element, for example, in the Rolling Stones . . .
— Morton Feldman

I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

Dr. Medulla
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by Dr. Medulla »

Heston wrote:
Dr. Medulla wrote:
Heston wrote:Who's Nick Markakis? Is he the president of Madagascar or something?
Plays right field for the Baltimore Orioles. Very good player for a very shitty team.
I understood three words of your first sentence.
Oh come on—even if you don't know the finer points of the game, you have to have a rudimentary knowledge of baseball.
"I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung." - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft

eumaas
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by eumaas »

Dr. Medulla wrote:
Heston wrote:
Dr. Medulla wrote:
Heston wrote:Who's Nick Markakis? Is he the president of Madagascar or something?
Plays right field for the Baltimore Orioles. Very good player for a very shitty team.
I understood three words of your first sentence.
Oh come on—even if you don't know the finer points of the game, you have to have a rudimentary knowledge of baseball.
Can any American here (besides me, since I looked it up) enunciate the basic rules of cricket from memory?
I feel that there is a fascistic element, for example, in the Rolling Stones . . .
— Morton Feldman

I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

Mimi
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Re: Does Nick Markakis really exist?

Post by Mimi »

eumaas wrote:
Dr. Medulla wrote:
Heston wrote:
Dr. Medulla wrote:
Heston wrote:Who's Nick Markakis? Is he the president of Madagascar or something?
Plays right field for the Baltimore Orioles. Very good player for a very shitty team.
I understood three words of your first sentence.
Oh come on—even if you don't know the finer points of the game, you have to have a rudimentary knowledge of baseball.
Can any American here (besides me, since I looked it up) enunciate the basic rules of cricket from memory?
There's some guys on a field, dressed in white with cute little hats. The bats are flat... Hey, don't they chirp?

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