If Music Could Talk

My dog will take that as compliment Mimi

The boy knows how to relax:-

I love your dog. If you ever need a dog sitter...

congrats on all the dogs and the not-dead fishes!

JennyB wrote: ↑

10 Jul 2017, 3:19pm

I love your dog. If you ever need a dog sitter...

Thanks for the offer Jenny but you would have to come to Yorkshire - as the saying goes 'God's own county'

Cheers

Mike

Strummer at the pub

On my ride today, coming back, I saw a turtle on the parkway (there's a river maybe 200m away, where I assume he came from). So I stopped, turned around, and went back for him, because there's no way he'd be able to get up the curb. He had a bit of a crack in his shell and there was some blood on it, but when I put him in the grass and aimed him toward the river, he scurried pretty well. I can only hope he's not dumb enough to turn around and plop onto the road again.

Dr. Medulla wrote: ↑

13 Jul 2017, 11:01am

On my ride today, coming back, I saw a turtle on the parkway (there's a river maybe 200m away, where I assume he came from). So I stopped, turned around, and went back for him, because there's no way he'd be able to get up the curb. He had a bit of a crack in his shell and there was some blood on it, but when I put him in the grass and aimed him toward the river, he scurried pretty well. I can only hope he's not dumb enough to turn around and plop onto the road again.

Turtles are so cute. We saw one in our neighborhood the other day. I took it out of the street and put it in someone's yard.

JennyB wrote: ↑

13 Jul 2017, 1:11pm

Dr. Medulla wrote: ↑

13 Jul 2017, 11:01am

On my ride today, coming back, I saw a turtle on the parkway (there's a river maybe 200m away, where I assume he came from). So I stopped, turned around, and went back for him, because there's no way he'd be able to get up the curb. He had a bit of a crack in his shell and there was some blood on it, but when I put him in the grass and aimed him toward the river, he scurried pretty well. I can only hope he's not dumb enough to turn around and plop onto the road again.

Turtles are so cute. We saw one in our neighborhood the other day. I took it out of the street and put it in someone's yard.

Not a snapping turtle I presume

JennyB wrote: ↑

13 Jul 2017, 1:11pm

Dr. Medulla wrote: ↑

13 Jul 2017, 11:01am

On my ride today, coming back, I saw a turtle on the parkway (there's a river maybe 200m away, where I assume he came from). So I stopped, turned around, and went back for him, because there's no way he'd be able to get up the curb. He had a bit of a crack in his shell and there was some blood on it, but when I put him in the grass and aimed him toward the river, he scurried pretty well. I can only hope he's not dumb enough to turn around and plop onto the road again.

Turtles are so cute. We saw one in our neighborhood the other day. I took it out of the street and put it in someone's yard.

I love turtles. Amazing creatures. When I was living in upstate NY, someone ran over a huge snapping turtle and crushed it. It was the size of a boulder so it's not like the driver couldn't see it. Apparently, this was something that happened a lot in the area. There was even a news segment about it and police warning not to do it. I mean, can you imagine?! Stupid fucknuts.

revbob wrote: ↑

13 Jul 2017, 8:45pm

JennyB wrote: ↑

13 Jul 2017, 1:11pm

Dr. Medulla wrote: ↑

13 Jul 2017, 11:01am

On my ride today, coming back, I saw a turtle on the parkway (there's a river maybe 200m away, where I assume he came from). So I stopped, turned around, and went back for him, because there's no way he'd be able to get up the curb. He had a bit of a crack in his shell and there was some blood on it, but when I put him in the grass and aimed him toward the river, he scurried pretty well. I can only hope he's not dumb enough to turn around and plop onto the road again.

Turtles are so cute. We saw one in our neighborhood the other day. I took it out of the street and put it in someone's yard.

Not a snapping turtle I presume

http://images.mentalfloss.com/sites/def ... kii_01.jpg

They definitely aren't that cute past a certain size.




Easter Sunday, 1988 or 89...my parents still cared enough to make us do the humiliating Catholic ritual of dressing up in tacky suits for Easter Sunday mass. Then taking pictures of us in the front garden by the tree decorated with plastic hanging eggs. My brother and I went out there early in our monkey suits, and saw a huge-ass snapping turtle sitting under the tree. At least 50 lbs. So my brother called out my sister "Come see the cute baby turtle!" And she immediately started screaming and crying loud enough to wake the whole neighborhood. Which just made the snapper start hissing angrily and lurch towards us. My mom was standing on the front porch telling us we needed to get rid of that thing or else we were wouldn't have time for pics in our monkey suits (really, Mom?). So my brother and I came up with an ingenious plan: he'd load it into the wheelbarrow with a garden shovel, and I'd cart it down to the end of the street and dump it in the brook so it could hunt gazelle or tree trunks or scrap metal or whatever the fuck something that bone-crushing huge ate for a living.

Our cunning plan started to go awry when my brother couldn't quite slip the shovel under it and get a grip because it was too heavy, which just made it all the more pissed off. So I played rodeo clown and tried to taunt it out of the garden onto the lawn. It was here where I was given the real reason the tortoise beat the hare: those fuckers can really move when they smell murder. Suddenly I was being chased in small spurts by this huge-ass thing while it hissed up a storm and made audible *snaps* with its jaw. And I could hear this over the sound of my sister screaming from the front porch.

So we decided it was time to charge...my brother came from behind with the shovel, I came from the front with the wheelbarrow...lip to the ground. And we flipped the thing over on its back and hurriedly shoved it into the wheelbarrow...taking a giant divot out of the lawn with it. It was now DEFCON 2-level pissed and making an audible roaring sound. I took off sprinting...in my monkey suit and dress shoes...down the middle of the street in the wheelbarrow screaming my ass off as this thing doggedly attempted to climb out onto the handlebars and maul me to death. The neighbors were starting to peek out their windows as I got 1 house, 2 houses closer to the brook at the end of the street: a 10-year old racing a wheelbarrow in his Sunday Best while a 50 lb. prehistoric reptile snapped at him, my brother tagged along at the back shouting "MOVE IT! HE'S GAINING ON YOU", and my sister screamed from the front porch. I made it to the brook out-of-breath and just pushed the whole wheelbarrow over the curb tumbling down the side. The snapper tumbled a few times, hissing, then landed by the stream and scurried off. I went home...and my mom yelled at me to go fetch the wheelbarrow I'd dumped in the brook.


Best Easter ever.

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, a vicious snapping turtle, that whoever survives battle with him shall not perish but have eternal life.

Great story, Rattie.

Mimi wrote: ↑

14 Jul 2017, 1:08pm

Great story, Rattie.

Agreed, awesome story.

Flex wrote: ↑

14 Jul 2017, 1:10pm

Mimi wrote: ↑

14 Jul 2017, 1:08pm

Great story, Rattie.

Agreed, awesome story.

Agreed!

Some feel goods for y'all.