Congrats Doc on the anniversary. We've got our two year coming up in six days, so 24 years seems unfathomable.
Also, welcome back Rattie.
You can do it Matey. We're in year 25 right now. Patience with each other and dont be dicks to each other.
And be content.
And appreciate that there is one person in the world that you know you can rely on and that you can likewise do for.
And appreciate that she puts up with my Bruce obsessions and beer hoarding. And referring to you guys by your usernames.
"haha!"
"What's so funny?"
"Oh tep made a joke about doc's hot dogs and wine being like an anniversary occasion. Ha!"
She doesn't leave after those sorts of interactions.
Look, you have to establish context for these things. And I maintain that unless you appreciate the Fall of Constantinople, the Great Fire of London, and Mickey Mantle's fatalist alcoholism, live Freddy makes no sense. If you want to half-ass it, fine, go call Simon Schama to do the appendix.
And appreciate that she puts up with my Bruce obsessions and beer hoarding. And referring to you guys by your usernames.
"haha!"
"What's so funny?"
"Oh tep made a joke about doc's hot dogs and wine being like an anniversary occasion. Ha!"
She doesn't leave after those sorts of interactions.
Personal experience says that tolerance for that fades around the second decade.
"I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung." - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft
CHEERS FOR RATTIE, DEATH TO THE CANADIAN FOR SOME REASON
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a bowl of soup
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a rolling hoop
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a ton of lead
Wiggle - you can raise the dead
CHEERS FOR RATTIE, DEATH TO THE CANADIAN FOR SOME REASON
Is it because I forgot to oil you?
"I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung." - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft
IF THIS IS ANYONE OTHER THAN MY OWN DAD, YOU'RE STEALING MY BIT.
Actually, it's not my bit because Jackson is still having pronoun trouble and is probably too literal-minded for dad jokes. But it would be...
Worse, my dad was fond less of dad jokes than questionable ethnic humour, so I really have no claim to that gag.
True story: early in our relationship, I described something as a Dad Joke, and Ali had no idea what that was. HER FATHER DOESN'T TELL JOKES.
As I pointed out, she has a Father. He's dignified, responsible, hard working, and emotionally distant. He watches westerns and prefers them to be historically accurate.
I have a Dad. He watches John Belushi and Chevy Chase movies, listens to Willie Nelson, and tells terrible jokes.
”INDER LOCK THE THE KISS THREAD IVE REALISED IM A PRZE IDOOT” - Thomas Jefferson
IF THIS IS ANYONE OTHER THAN MY OWN DAD, YOU'RE STEALING MY BIT.
Actually, it's not my bit because Jackson is still having pronoun trouble and is probably too literal-minded for dad jokes. But it would be...
Worse, my dad was fond less of dad jokes than questionable ethnic humour, so I really have no claim to that gag.
True story: early in our relationship, I described something as a Dad Joke, and Ali had no idea what that was. HER FATHER DOESN'T TELL JOKES.
My understanding of the entertainment biz has taught me that all Jews are quite funny. Something doesn't add up here.
As I pointed out, she has a Father. He's dignified, responsible, hard working, and emotionally distant. He watches westerns and prefers them to be historically accurate.
I have a Dad. He watches John Belushi and Chevy Chase movies, listens to Willie Nelson, and tells terrible jokes.
Mine was much closer to Ali's. He enjoyed a laugh, but his tastes were, as I said, jokes about Ukrainians and Ollie and Lena (Norwegian jokes). Plus he liked old-time country music. But "dignified, responsible, hard working, and emotionally distant" describes him fairly well.
"I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung." - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft
So we've established that Doc was vomiting uncontrollably due to his anniversary. Now who's the narc???
No, no, it was my wife who made me ill, not the anniversary. [comedic pause followed by a scene of a rolling pin and an Andy Capp cloud of violence]
"I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung." - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft
So we've established that Doc was vomiting uncontrollably due to his anniversary. Now who's the narc???
Julie? Joe? maybe it's you? where have you been hiding?
Look, there comes a time...specifically, when the news is all full of headless torsos turning up in freezers during the full moon...where you just have to lay low for a bit and take some "me time", that's all. I'm not the one being questioned here. I just want to know who the narc is. This interview is over unless you come back with a warrant!
So we've established that Doc was vomiting uncontrollably due to his anniversary. Now who's the narc???
Julie? Joe? maybe it's you? where have you been hiding?
Look, there comes a time...specifically, when the news is all full of headless torsos turning up in freezers during the full moon...where you just have to lay low for a bit and take some "me time", that's all. I'm not the one being questioned here. I just want to know who the narc is. This interview is over unless you come back with a warrant!
No problem.
Forces have been looting
My humanity
Curfews have been curbing
The end of liberty
We're the flowers in the dustbin...
No fuchsias for you.
So we've established that Doc was vomiting uncontrollably due to his anniversary. Now who's the narc???
No, no, it was my wife who made me ill, not the anniversary. [comedic pause followed by a scene of a rolling pin and an Andy Capp cloud of violence]
Weird. I thought that scene happened in a Simpsons episode.
"I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung." - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft
So we've established that Doc was vomiting uncontrollably due to his anniversary. Now who's the narc???
No, no, it was my wife who made me ill, not the anniversary. [comedic pause followed by a scene of a rolling pin and an Andy Capp cloud of violence]
Weird. I thought that scene happened in a Simpsons episode.
I think that's too obvious of a reference for the Simpsons. They tended to be more sly about it.
Subtlety gives Seth McF a serious rash.
"I never doubted myself for a minute for I knew that my monkey-strong bowels were girded with strength, like the loins of a dragon ribboned with fat and the opulence of buffalo dung." - Richard Nixon, Checkers Speech, abandoned early draft