FAO eumaas

Sweet action for kids 'n' cretins. Marjoram and capers.
Dr. Medulla
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Re: FAO eumaas

Post by Dr. Medulla » 02 Dec 2017, 9:23am

I've been reading john Hodgman's Vacationland, which contains an essay on vacationing in Maine. I immediately thought of you and your connection to the land (as well as the many Massholes here). A few passages:
Maine used to be part of Massachusetts, by some arrangement that made zero sense. They have never shared a border, and for most of the early life of the Union, Massachusetts ignored Maine, which was named either for a French province or a British town or for the fact that the dirt and rock portions of the state are not oceans, but the mainland. No one knows for sure. Large parts of the region north of the Penobscot River were barely mapped, and essentially ceded to British Canada. It only became a state in 1820 as part of the Missouri Compromise. Missouri wanted to enter the Union as a slave state, so the US government needed to find a new territory to enter as a free state, because it was believed this would make the practice of owning other humans less brutally and eternally criminal somehow. It didn’t. But in any case, the government was calling around to the states (and commonwealths) asking if anyone had any garbage land they didn’t want, and Massachusetts said, “Oh yes! We absolutely do. We have this whole, massive hump of half-Canada up there that we never use. Take it.” And that was how Maine was born: a new state, created in part to sustain a horrible evil, but only serving to delay its inevitable collapse by forty-three years
The idea of having several days, never mind weeks or months, to relocate to a climate that was better for your lungs or gout, or to have an extra home in which to practice bridge strategies and indolence, was unimaginable to all but the most wealthy Bostonians, who were inbred and warped. Their idea of vacation was to go north, to a cold dark place, where they would not speak to their families but instead sit in silence, drinking martinis, looking out over bodies of water that you would never, EVER go into. Because the waters of Maine are made of hate and want to kill you.

The ocean in Maine is traumatically cold. If you make the mistake of going into it, every cell in your body will begin shouting the first half of the word “hypothermia” into your brain; the second half will simply be frozen tears. And the beaches of Maine offer no relief as you launch yourself back onto shore, because the beaches of Maine are made out of jagged stones shaped like knives.
The archetypal examples of Maine Humor are the “Bert and I” stories, recounting the non-adventures of a lobsterman (“I”) and his sternman, Bert. A typical “Bert and I” story (and the first) involves Bert and I starting their boat, the Bluebird. Then they go out to sea. Then they get stuck in fog. Then they get hit by a larger boat. The end. All of this is punctuated by dry asides and incomprehensible local terminology and vocal imitations of lobster boat engines made from breath and spittle that my wife finds disgusting and scary. There are many books and albums of these stories, and I have eventually come to enjoy them. Sometimes they actually are funny in a way that is very quiet and very occasional. But they are always hypnotic, the storyteller’s twisty, alien accent devolving into white noise.
Endut! Hoch Hech!

I feel that, had he lived, John Lennon would have loved Donkey Kong.

eumaas
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Re: FAO eumaas

Post by eumaas » 02 Dec 2017, 11:00am

That was excellent. Thanks!
I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

Dr. Medulla
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Re: FAO eumaas

Post by Dr. Medulla » 18 Feb 2018, 12:46pm

http://www.thejakartapost.com/news/2018 ... -govt.html

That there's been an official response is delightful and reminds me of an LBJ story from his primary campaign for a Senate seat in Texas. The race was close and he told his staff to spread a rumour that Stevenson had sex with farm animals. An aide told him that nobody would believe that Stevenson was a pig-fucker, but LBJ said, "Of course not, but make him publicly deny it."
Endut! Hoch Hech!

I feel that, had he lived, John Lennon would have loved Donkey Kong.

eumaas
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Re: FAO eumaas

Post by eumaas » 18 Feb 2018, 12:57pm

Dr. Medulla wrote:
18 Feb 2018, 12:46pm
http://www.thejakartapost.com/news/2018 ... -govt.html

That there's been an official response is delightful and reminds me of an LBJ story from his primary campaign for a Senate seat in Texas. The race was close and he told his staff to spread a rumour that Stevenson had sex with farm animals. An aide told him that nobody would believe that Stevenson was a pig-fucker, but LBJ said, "Of course not, but make him publicly deny it."
I am not swallowing that Canadian bacon for one minute. The boy is Fidel's.
I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

Dr. Medulla
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Re: FAO eumaas

Post by Dr. Medulla » 18 Feb 2018, 1:41pm

eumaas wrote:
18 Feb 2018, 12:57pm
Dr. Medulla wrote:
18 Feb 2018, 12:46pm
http://www.thejakartapost.com/news/2018 ... -govt.html

That there's been an official response is delightful and reminds me of an LBJ story from his primary campaign for a Senate seat in Texas. The race was close and he told his staff to spread a rumour that Stevenson had sex with farm animals. An aide told him that nobody would believe that Stevenson was a pig-fucker, but LBJ said, "Of course not, but make him publicly deny it."
I am not swallowing that Canadian bacon for one minute. The boy is Fidel's.
He needs to do one of those ancestry tests to see whether he has Caribbean DNA in his profile.
Endut! Hoch Hech!

I feel that, had he lived, John Lennon would have loved Donkey Kong.

Dr. Medulla
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Re: FAO eumaas

Post by Dr. Medulla » 27 Mar 2018, 12:35pm

I haven't watched it, but thought it might interest you.
Endut! Hoch Hech!

I feel that, had he lived, John Lennon would have loved Donkey Kong.

eumaas
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Re: FAO eumaas

Post by eumaas » 28 Mar 2018, 10:14am

Dr. Medulla wrote:
27 Mar 2018, 12:35pm
I haven't watched it, but thought it might interest you.
Awesome. Will watch tonight. Got bad carpal tunnel so not really posting. Resting my damnd hand.
I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

Kory
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Re: FAO eumaas

Post by Kory » 28 Mar 2018, 4:11pm

eumaas wrote:
28 Mar 2018, 10:14am
Dr. Medulla wrote:
27 Mar 2018, 12:35pm
I haven't watched it, but thought it might interest you.
Awesome. Will watch tonight. Got bad carpal tunnel so not really posting. Resting my damnd hand.
From synthing?
Inder:
Absolutely. Here's another collection of words:

Table salt (spoon hinge)
Octopus (Ukraine)
St. Petersburg (arms)
Ginger beer (cauliflower)
Pat Sajak (PSak)
Lamp post (self evident)
Florida Timeshare (ditto)
Heraclitus (EMI)
Developers (Developers Developers)
Boogie With Your Children

eumaas
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Re: FAO eumaas

Post by eumaas » 02 Apr 2018, 10:52am

Kory wrote:
28 Mar 2018, 4:11pm
eumaas wrote:
28 Mar 2018, 10:14am
Dr. Medulla wrote:
27 Mar 2018, 12:35pm
I haven't watched it, but thought it might interest you.
Awesome. Will watch tonight. Got bad carpal tunnel so not really posting. Resting my damnd hand.
From synthing?
No, I think from using the computer. Also badly injured my thumb so I can't use my left hand hardly at all, so I can only manage to use the computer for a short period of time, and can't really hold a damn book. Suggestions on ways to occupy my time that barely involve my hands? Should I just watch netflix until I expire?
I've studied the phenomenon of neo-provincialism in self-isolating online communities but this place takes the fucking cake.
— Clashy

Silent Majority
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Re: FAO eumaas

Post by Silent Majority » 02 Apr 2018, 11:43am

eumaas wrote:
02 Apr 2018, 10:52am
Kory wrote:
28 Mar 2018, 4:11pm
eumaas wrote:
28 Mar 2018, 10:14am
Dr. Medulla wrote:
27 Mar 2018, 12:35pm
I haven't watched it, but thought it might interest you.
Awesome. Will watch tonight. Got bad carpal tunnel so not really posting. Resting my damnd hand.
From synthing?
No, I think from using the computer. Also badly injured my thumb so I can't use my left hand hardly at all, so I can only manage to use the computer for a short period of time, and can't really hold a damn book. Suggestions on ways to occupy my time that barely involve my hands? Should I just watch netflix until I expire?
Audiobookbay is my lifesaver.
You're frettin', you're sweatin'
But did you notice, not gettin' anywhere


http://macgowansongs.blogspot.co.uk
www.pexlives.libsyn.com/

Dr. Medulla
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Re: FAO eumaas

Post by Dr. Medulla » 02 Apr 2018, 1:36pm

Silent Majority wrote:
02 Apr 2018, 11:43am
eumaas wrote:
02 Apr 2018, 10:52am
Kory wrote:
28 Mar 2018, 4:11pm
eumaas wrote:
28 Mar 2018, 10:14am
Dr. Medulla wrote:
27 Mar 2018, 12:35pm
I haven't watched it, but thought it might interest you.
Awesome. Will watch tonight. Got bad carpal tunnel so not really posting. Resting my damnd hand.
From synthing?
No, I think from using the computer. Also badly injured my thumb so I can't use my left hand hardly at all, so I can only manage to use the computer for a short period of time, and can't really hold a damn book. Suggestions on ways to occupy my time that barely involve my hands? Should I just watch netflix until I expire?
Audiobookbay is my lifesaver.
Audiobooks or winning imaginary arguments in my head.
Endut! Hoch Hech!

I feel that, had he lived, John Lennon would have loved Donkey Kong.

Kory
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Unknown Immortal
Posts: 8251
Joined: 17 Jun 2008, 1:42pm
Location: In the Discosphere

Re: FAO eumaas

Post by Kory » 02 Apr 2018, 3:46pm

eumaas wrote:
02 Apr 2018, 10:52am
Kory wrote:
28 Mar 2018, 4:11pm
eumaas wrote:
28 Mar 2018, 10:14am
Dr. Medulla wrote:
27 Mar 2018, 12:35pm
I haven't watched it, but thought it might interest you.
Awesome. Will watch tonight. Got bad carpal tunnel so not really posting. Resting my damnd hand.
From synthing?
No, I think from using the computer. Also badly injured my thumb so I can't use my left hand hardly at all, so I can only manage to use the computer for a short period of time, and can't really hold a damn book. Suggestions on ways to occupy my time that barely involve my hands? Should I just watch netflix until I expire?
Yeah, it's basically going to be watching TV, listening to music or audiobooks and trying to use your hands as little as possible, probably for about two weeks or so. Hopefully the CT is from a swelling rather than a bunch of scar tissue and it will go away on its own. After that, regular icing and paying real close attention to your posture and the position of your wrists when you use them.
Inder:
Absolutely. Here's another collection of words:

Table salt (spoon hinge)
Octopus (Ukraine)
St. Petersburg (arms)
Ginger beer (cauliflower)
Pat Sajak (PSak)
Lamp post (self evident)
Florida Timeshare (ditto)
Heraclitus (EMI)
Developers (Developers Developers)
Boogie With Your Children

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